Holy moly, folks! As we're cruising through 2025, I've been reflecting on some absolutely bone-chilling gaming decisions that still haunt my dreams. I mean, we're talking about factions so messed up that choosing them feels like ordering a pizza with pineapple and anchovies—just plain wrong on every level. These aren't just 'bad' choices; they're catastrophic, game-ruining, soul-crushing decisions that'll make you want to throw your controller through the window. Let me take you on a wild ride through the absolute worst of the worst!
The Stormcloaks - Skyrim's Racist Rebellion
Man, oh man! When I first stumbled into Windhelm back in the day, I thought Ulfric and his Stormcloaks were the coolest rebels since Han Solo. But holy guacamole, was I wrong! 🤯 These guys are basically the gaming equivalent of that one racist uncle at Thanksgiving dinner who won't stop talking about 'traditional values.'
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Racism Central: They treat non-Nords like second-class citizens
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Thalmor Puppets: Secretly backed by the very elves they claim to fight
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Civil War Chaos: Their rebellion weakens Skyrim right when unity is needed most
Choosing the Stormcloaks is like volunteering to be the designated driver at a party where everyone's drinking poison. Just don't do it!
Radovid's Redanian Loyalists - The Witcher 3's Mad King
OMG, Radovid is basically what would happen if your crazy ex got control of a kingdom. This dude makes Joffrey from Game of Thrones look like Mr. Rogers! When I had the chance to side with him, I thought, 'Maybe he's misunderstood?' Nope, nope, nope!
| What He Does | Why It's Awful |
|---|---|
| Witch Hunts | Burns innocent mages and non-humans |
| Paranoia | Executes anyone who looks at him funny |
| Imperial Ambitions | Invades peaceful regions for fun |
Siding with Radovid is like choosing to ride a rollercoaster that's actively on fire. The thrill isn't worth the third-degree burns!
The Rakyat Tribe - Far Cry 3's Betrayal Bonanza
Dude, when Citra offered me that 'special' ending, I should've known something was fishy. I mean, she literally murders all your friends and then kills YOU?! That's some next-level betrayal that makes Game of Thrones look like a preschool drama. 💀
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Friendship Obliteration: Your entire crew gets brutally murdered
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Romantic Betrayal: Citra stabs you during intimate moments
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Prophetic Nonsense: All for some vague warrior child prophecy
Choosing the Rakyat is like swiping right on Tinder and ending up in a cult. Run, don't walk away!
Golden Path Extremists - Far Cry 4's No-Win Scenario
Seriously, Far Cry 4 said 'hold my beer' to Far Cry 3's bad endings and created a situation where every choice is worse than the last. It's like being asked to choose between getting punched in the face or kicked in the stomach. 😫
Amita's Militants: Child soldiers and drug trafficking
Sabal's Traditionalists: Religious extremism and executions
Pagan Min: Literal torture and murder continues
This is the gaming equivalent of being stuck between a rock, a hard place, and an active volcano!
The Dung Eater - Elden Ring's Poopocalypse
Let's be real for a second: when a guy introduces himself as 'Dung Eater,' that should be your cue to nope right out of there. But no, my curious self had to see what would happen. BIG MISTAKE! 🤢
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Apocalyptic Pox: Dooms the entire Lands Between
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Universal Defilement: Everything becomes corrupted
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Literally Named After Feces: Need I say more?
Joining the Dung Eater is like volunteering to clean public restrooms with your tongue. Just... why?!
The Institute - Fallout 4's Family Reunion Gone Wrong
Finding out your long-lost son is the leader of a secret society that replaces people with robots? That's some serious family drama that makes Thanksgiving arguments look tame! The Institute is colder than my ex's heart and twice as calculating. ❄️
Their Greatest Hits:
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🤖 Replacing people with synthetic duplicates
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💥 Actively destroying surface civilization
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😶 Emotional manipulation through family ties
Siding with the Institute is like choosing to live in a freezer because you're tired of room temperature. It's just not worth it!
Perseus' Loyalists - Black Ops Cold War's Nuclear Betrayal
When I discovered I was actually working for the bad guy all along, my jaw hit the floor harder than my New Year's resolutions. Choosing to side with Perseus isn't just a bad ending—it's a continent-ending catastrophe! 💣
Consequences of Betrayal:
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☢️ Europe gets nuked
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👥 All your teammates die
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🇺🇸 America takes the blame
This choice is like discovering your Uber driver is actually driving you off a cliff. Jump out while you still can!
Chaos Forces - Warhammer's Corrupting Influence
Chaos in Warhammer games is like that friend who always wants you to do 'just one line' of something questionable. It starts with small compromises and ends with you becoming a tentacled monstrosity serving dark gods. Not exactly career-building material! 🐙
Corruption Progression:
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😇 Minor artifact use
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😈 Killing loyal allies
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👹 Full Chaos transformation
Dabbling with Chaos is like microwaving metal—it might seem fun at first, but you'll regret it when everything explodes!
Caesar's Legion - Fallout New Vegas' Technological Dark Age
Caesar's Legion makes the Roman Empire look like a progressive utopia. These guys are so evil they make Darth Vader look like a misunderstood emo kid. Choosing them is like volunteering to live in a world without electricity, women's rights, or basic human decency. 😱
Legion Lifestyle:
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️ Slavery and oppression
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🚫 Technology rejection
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✝️ Crucifixion as public policy
Joining the Legion is like choosing to live in a museum where everything is trying to kill you. Hard pass!
Arasaka Corporation - Cyberpunk 2077's Corporate Nightmare
In 2025, corporations are scary enough in real life without having to deal with Arasaka's brand of dystopian evil. These guys have started wars, killed millions, and make Amazon look like a charity organization. Choosing them is the ultimate 'sell your soul' moment. 💀
Arasaka's Greatest Crimes:
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🌍 Starting Corporate Wars
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🍽️ Sabotaging food supplies
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👻 Digital soul imprisonment
Siding with Arasaka is like trusting a used car salesman who's also a known arsonist. Nothing good can come from it!
So there you have it, my fellow gamers! These factions prove that sometimes the 'evil' path isn't just morally questionable—it's downright catastrophic. In 2025, with gaming choices becoming more complex than ever, remember: if a faction's leader is named after feces or wants to nuke continents, maybe swipe left on that option. Your virtual conscience will thank you! 🙏